Sudden down drafts suck, not just when you’re flying in a plane but also in life. The other day I was feeling wonderful, enjoying a Zen-like serenity, and drama popped my bubble with a generous dose of anger and judgment. I heard my son coming down the street crying, went to meet him, and his mouth was covered with blood. Another child in the neighborhood tried to steal his scooter and punched him in the mouth. I’m very forgiving and understanding in most situations, but don’t mess with my kids. The Mother Bear in me is not so tolerant!
Last week this same kid threw a dodge ball at my son’s face and has been verbally bullying him for a couple of years. I had enough. As much as I wanted to go “discipline” both child and parent, I called the sheriff instead. The long wait for his arrival gave me plenty of time to stew in my anger and build up some resentment to go with it. My body is no longer accustomed to the energy of those emotions so I got lightheaded and nauseous. That’s when I realized what I was doing to myself. The kid hurt my son in one moment and I was dragging that moment on, holding it inside. My son had already stopped crying and bleeding, but I was still fuming.
The sheriff handled the situation appropriately and left. That should have been the end of it. For me it continued for a few more hours. The sudden burst of anger woke up remnants of anger from my past that needed to be (finally) released. I also had to make a choice. The anger was mine. I was the one holding it, and I was the one being hurt by it. Did I want to continue that self-abuse?
No, I really didn’t want to linger in the pit I found myself in. Justification is so much easier than letting go, but it doesn’t serve me well. I decided to release the whole thing and within minutes something funny happened. It had me and my kids laughing out loud until we were out of breath. Perfect! That was all it took to exit the pit and rise back up to a high frequency state of being. Whew, what a relief!
Do you notice when something drags you down? How do you respond to it? I’d love to hear your thoughts!